Today berbuka kat luar again... but this time because of work. Had a meeting about an event that my team is organising this November. OK laa the food kat Prince Hotel... nothing spectacular. I still think the best hotel makan place are Lemon Garden and SuDu. Yumm!!! Bila pergi Prince baru lah nampak Pavillion for the very first time. Besar siot that place... have to go and check it out lah. Maybe masa cuti raya nanti...
You know... sometimes you think you know someone but you actually don't. Today for example I learnt that NN's parents are separated, that her sister is unwell with a nerve related illness, that she's been keeping in touch with one of the interns that we had in our dept. Tak sangka...
Hafiz was his name. Dia datang buat internship for 2 months in June this year. I ada lah berbual dgn dia tapi tak lah banyak sangat. Sedar2 dia dah nak habis his internship. Two days before dia habis, he came to see me to minta my signature for his allowance claim form and to ask me to fill up his evaluation form. Masa tu I tgh stress sikit... ada byk benda nak kena siapkan. So I was a bit unhappy that he left it until quite last minute to ask me to complete his borang and write his testimonial. So I *sound* dia sikit... that he can't leave things until the last minute and expect people to do what he nak minta orang buat. He said sorry... I angguk je lah, still a bit geram. Then bila nak sign his allowance form, he explained that he had taken a few days off. I had heard that his grandmother passed away... so I wasn't surprised. But the information that was revealed to me in the ensuing conversation did...
"I'm sorry to hear about your grandmother", I said.
He just smiled... didn't say anything.
"Nenek belah mak ke ayah?" I bertanya.
"Belah mak", he replied. "Tapi lepas ni saya tak tahu lah sama ada akan balik ke kampung ke tak".
Huh? What does that have anything to do with it? "Your mother bukan kat kampung ke?" I asked.
Softly he replied, "Mak saya dah takde".
My heart dropped. "Oh...." was all I could mutter.
"Saya rapat dengan nenek. Saya duduk dengan dia... dia yang besarkan saya", he added voluntarily.
I became curious, "Your father?"
"Ayah saya pun tak ada. Saya tak pernah kenal dia. Sejak mak meninggal saya duduk dengan nenek", he said in a calm voice... as if it is was something very normal.
I could feel tears welling up, tapi tried my best to control. Didn't know what to say. What do you say to someone who is anak yatim piatu and had just lost his only other guardian? "I didn't know that..."
"Sekarang nenek pun dah tak ada, tinggal saya dengan adik saya je lah. Dia tengah belajar kat UiTM. Kat kampung dah tak ada sape2 lagi"
I began to regret being stern with him earlier. Oh gosh... how could I have been so inconsiderate and heartless. Not knowing what to say, I just asked the first thing that came to mind, "So lepas ni pergi mana?"
"Minggu depan class dah nak start, so saya duduk rumah pakcik je lah sementara tunggu semester mula"
"I see..." was all I could say. "OK.. tinggalkan borang tu, nanti I isi".
Immediately after he left my room I messaged ZI... told her about what I just heard. This young man, barely an adult, had gone through so much and had lost so much at such a young age. He is now the *parent*, the head of a family which consists of just him and his sister.
If he hadn't come to me to ask me to sign the form, I wouldn't have known. And I would have assumed that he has someone who supports him and provides him unconditional love and care.
I quickly wrote a short email asking some friends whether they'd like to beri some sedekah... explained his predicament. We managed to collect about RM800. Alhamdulillah...
The next day when I passed him his form, I gave him the money. "Ni hadiah drp we all... untuk tolong Hafiz masa belajar, buat beli buku...". The look on his face when I gave it to him was a mix of disbelief and sadness. This time he didn't have a smile as a response. He was silent for a while and then he said "Terima kasih banyak-banyak". But his facial expression said a lot more... it was obvious that he was extremely grateful for the generosity that was bestowed upon him. Like the Mastercard advertisement, priceless...
I advised him to study hard, make sure he gets good results and if ada rezeki, boleh lah apply kerja kat sini. He said "Memang saya kena make sure dapat yang terbaik... sebab I cannot afford otherwise. Adik saya still belajar. Saya perlu kerja untuk sara dia".
Sometimes we take for granted what we have. How often do we count our blessing and thank Him? I for one have never had to shoulder the responsibility to menyara anyone, to be responsible for another person. So far, I've only had to take care of myself... tu pun tak lah bagus mana. In that respect I feel like I've not really grown into an *adult*. Physically yes, but emotionally?
I do believe that one is not really an adult until he/she is responsible for another person. Whether it is your parent, your spouse, your child...
We have not passed that subtle line between childhood and adulthood until we move from the passive voice to the active voice -- that is, until we stop saying "It got lost," and say "I lost it." (Sydney J Harris)
I also believe that true love is when you would do anything to make the person you love happy... regardless. It is when you're willing to give love and not expect it in return. You can't force someone to love you... it must come from within, naturally.
As the saying goes... If you love something, set it free; if it comes back it's yours, if it doesn't, it never was (anonymous)
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